You're the What Now?
by Ispell2
Summary: After following a disappearing dragon through a portal, Dragonborn Beskyddare ends up in a forest outside Cleveland, and gets captured by the scoobies. But when she explains what's happening, Slayer Buffy Summers insists it's her job too. Will she be a help, or will Buffy just get in the way? And will they find a way to stop the portals from opening and send Beskyddare back home?
1. Chapter 1

"I've_ got you now, dragon!"_, Beskyddare thought, as she cornered the gray dragon. Hunting it, she was, but not hunting to kill. For months now, fewer and fewer dragons were being sighted. This would be a good thing, if it weren't for the fact that it was always accompanied by a large blue light. That's all anyone saw. Beskyddare thought that it sounded suspiciously like the portal to Sovngarde she had fallen through when she had to defeat Alduin. She'd tracked this dragon for weeks, and she had a feeling in her gut that he'd be 'disappearing' soon, too.

She'd followed him (or her) to the edge of Skyrim and back to the outskirts of Whiterun. She'd tracked him down and learned his patterns. What he ate, how he slept, where he liked to go, when he did anything. Hell, she'd even learned what Dragon scat looked like. It wasn't pretty, and was almost as big as herself. Wasn't much, though. She was short for a Nord. She looked funny, too. Too skinny, scrawny, and tan, and her hair had a strange sort of blondness to it, almost brown underneath the first few layers. Her eyes were brown, and her nose was thin, and she did not seem to fit in, physically. Beskyddare wasn't a normal Nord.

Of course, the strength and skill that came with being the Dragonborn helped her a lot. She never got attacked outside of work, except by the most foolhardy people and vampires. Beauty and strength came with a price though. She wasn't the brightest bulb in the box, nor was she the most stable. One of the many reasons she married Farkas. It was hard for her to be away from her family, though, which sucked because she was almost never home. She was worried that her Housecarl was the woman of the house now; that her husband was in love with her, or that her own children liked her better.

She accepted that the two older girls, Sofia and Lucia, wanted Lydia more than herself, but not her birth children. She was a fast moving girl, only twenty-five, and had been married, and given birth to three children already. Sofia and Lucia, the adopted children, Audulfr and Beiti, the boys, and Hirvifrid, the daughter, born before Beiti. But that was life for Skyrim. You grow up, work hard, get married, have kids, continue working hard, then keel over. At least she got to put adventure in there somewhere. And dragons. Let's not forget killing dragons. She wanted to get to the bottom of this first, though.

Her family would just have to wait. Again. She sat behind a cluster of rocks near the steam geysers of Eastmarch, watching the dragon start to roost for the night. He tended to sleep during the night, spreading his wings and digging the horns of them in to the rock or dirt and resting his head nearby a geyser. She hadn't known before this expedition that dragons got stuffed noses just like herself. He seemed to need a humidifier when he went to sleep, because for the past few days he'd slept near the geysers. He liked the heat, too.

Beskyddare did not like it. She preferred the warmth of the cotton mattress bed at home in her room, covered in furs, and her husband's manly chest and arm hair. She always wondered how such a hairy bear of a man couldn't grow a simple beard, though. Her husband... Oh, when she got home, she'd be sending the children to visit their grandparents or to a school. That would leave the house empty, and she and her husband... She wanted this particular adventure to be over already, so she could go back there and eat and sleep and frolic to her hearts content.

She was so caught up in her thinking that she almost didn't notice the dragon wasn't going to sleep like he normally did. In fact, he was circling the ground like a dog. He seemed to be uneasy, worrying about some unknown problem. Maybe he wasn't tired? Perhaps he felt sick? Or maybe... Her ponderings were answered quickly enough, because the air above the pacing dragon opened in to a swirling blue vortex. He resisted at first, trying to sink his claws in the rocky ground like a cat being lifted from a carpet, but soon he relaxed and let go. Beskyddare had to act quickly. She had to think clearly.

Wait, what was that part about thinking? Because before she knew it, she'd grabbed ahold of the dragon's tail, and was sucked through the portal with him. She felt nonexistent wind whipping around her, and felt no oxygen for her lungs, yet, somehow, she breathed as if she were in a clear open meadow, no scents or dust to disturb clean breaths. But she lost her grip on the scaly tail, and started to fall. Or, it felt like falling. None of it was quite like anything she'd ever felt before. She could see the blue light, yet she could see nothing at all.

She felt like she was being forced through a tight tube of stretchy fabric that could rip at any moment, but it couldn't. She felt the airless wind run by her and in her lungs, but there was no room. She was falling, and yet she was moving forward. No sound, no sense, no sight could be trusted. At least, not until she felt the wind knocked out of her lungs and her armor press her breasts in to her chest. Pain surged throughout the area, and she pulled herself up a quickly as she could, and unbuckled the steel plate from her chest.

She prodded and rubbed all of the sore areas, not just her chest, and lay on her back for a few moments in pain, until she could breath properly and stand on two legs. Okay, maybe crawl on two legs and two arms. She attached the chest plate to her back, and crawled along for a moment. The blasted dragon had gotten here earlier, or maybe it had gotten away in her surprise, and worst of all, she had no idea where she was. She was in a forest, and that's all she could tell. She sat back for a moment and looked at her surroundings. It was dark, and a misty fog was rolling though the floor of the forest.

The trees were thin and tall, like none she'd ever seen before, and none of the bushes and plants looked familiar. Another realm? Dimension? Afterlife? Just where was she? She looked to the sky for direction, thinking a guiding prayer. Her heart dropped in to her stomach and froze. The sky... What was wrong with the sky? What was wrong with the MOONS? Where did the other one go, and why was this one so small?! She started to thaw from the numb feeling and burn over in to terror. Just what was going on here? She frantically looked around the wooden area, stood up, reattached her chest plate, and drew her weapons.

She saw a bit of movement just away from her. Her fight or flight reflex started to kick in. She took a breath, wiped the sweat from her hands, and repositioned her weapons and stance. She let out a fierce battle-cry and charged at the movement. She tackled it to the ground, and was about to cut it apart, when she realized it was just a harmless deer. She let it get up and run off. She giggled a little at how silly she had been as she sheathed her swords, and turned. She was now facing a young blonde girl, about her age, wearing a sarcastic face. She looked familiar... Very familiar... Wait... Her face!

The face before her was cleaner and brighter, and in a simple ponytail was hair exactly like hers. Eyes exactly like hers. She was like a long lost twin. Identical in every factor, aside from a few leftover stretch marks, a very slight mommy pooch (That extra skin from giving birth), and general dirt and such. The reflection of herself looked surprised, too. Well, she did before everything went black.

"Buffy, what's wrong? You let _ME _get the demon this time! You feeling alright?", Xander asked Buffy as he looked at her with concern. He twirled the shovel in his hands. She gave him a shocked look, and when his eyes were following hers, she looked down at the unconscious woman at their feet, and Xander watched too. "It looks like we've got some trouble.", she said as she stared at her identically faced viking-warrior incarnate. She suddenly looked back over to Xander. "Wait. Where did you get a shovel?"

* * *

Xander and Buffy carried Beskyddare in to Giles' living room and laid her on the couch. They let go of her as soon as she was resting on the sofa, and pulled their hands back as if they had just touched something hot. Giles had been up late, secretly watching TV in the back, but hurried to turn off and hide it, and ran to the living room. His new house in Cleveland was a lot more spacious than his apartment in Sunnydale. It had two bedrooms, a large bathroom, a lovely kitchen, a dining room, a basement room, and even a few rooms to spare.

It was outside the city, about a ten minute drive away, and was nestled in to a clearing in the second layer of the forest. It was pretty cheap, due to it having a few issues of the haunting property, but everyone chipped in, and they fixed up the house, and now it was liveable. It was actually a pretty exquisite place, underneath all of the grime and broken wood. He liked it a lot better, too. No people to bother him except for the scoobies. And now there was a Norse Buffy Lookalike sleeping on his couch, ready to wake up at any moment and slaughter them all.

He grasped his head and stood slack jawed over her. "What on Earth is... Buffy, who is this?", he asked, shocked. "That's what we'd like to know.", Xander said for her. Buffy was crouched beside Beskyddare, examining the dirty face. It was _her _face, but it wasn't. It was worn and worked, and had lines she didn't, and scars and bruises she'd never had anywhere. "We need to wake her up. I don't think she's a demon.", Buffy said to Giles and Xander. "Uh, hello, Earth to BuffY? How many demons have we come across that looked like perfectly normal people? What makes her different?", Xander said sarcastically.

"She looks like me. _That's_ what makes her different.", she replied a little angrily. She shook Beskyddare's arm and slapped her face. Maybe a little _too _hard. Beskyddare slowly opened her eyes, making an effort not the move around too much. She looked around the room. Strange furniture, strange walls, strange people, strange... The mirror girl! Beskyddare made a jump for her swords, but they weren't on her hips like they should have been. She coward in to the sofa, and pressed herself against it as hard as she could. "Who... Who are you people? Where am I?", she said, lips trembling as the words fell out full of fear.

"You're in Cleveland Ohio.", Giles said quietly, fidgeting with his glasses as he often did. At this point, Dawn had come to the living room to see what was happening. She froze behind her sister and stayed there quietly, as if her sister's presence in front of her would shield her from the potential evil that was on the sofa, wearing full armor and her sister's face. That made her cling to Buffy's arm like a child, seeing someone who looked just like her sister that wasn't her sister. "Call me Giles, and this is-", Xander interrupted.

"Woah woah woah! Don't give it my name! What if it's, like, a name eating demon who takes your soul with your name?! Those exist you know!", he panicked. Everyone in the room, including Beskyddare stared at him like the paranoid idiot he was. Buffy Broke the silence. "That's Xander"-"hey!"- "And that's my sister Dawn.", she said, gesturing to the cowaring seventeen-year old girl behind her. "I'm Buffy. Buffy Summers. Who are you?", she said with a kind smile. "I...", Beskyddare started. She took a breath, gathered herself, and finished.

"I am Beskyddare, the Dragonborn." The room somehow got more silent. Buffy's face went in to a blank smile. "The what now?"


	2. Chapter 2

AN: Alrighty, it's fixed! Note to self, never write when on ambien. It makes you... dirty... Just one more thing, though. I really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really HATE Dawn, so I tried to make her as bratty as possible. Thing is, that level of brattiness is not yet capable of human acknowledgement, so she appears to be in character. On a side note, there have been some questions as to why I believe that there is no contraceptive in Skyrim: I have never come across anything that would suggest there are contraceptives that can be legally obtained in the game, anywhere. Not even from Lemkil, who desperately hates his daughters!

* * *

"I'm the Dragonborn." "The what now?"

* * *

Beskyddare looked at them like they were the crazy ones. "Dragonborn. I'm the Dragonborn. Born in to the world to defeat evil, be it man or Dragon or more.", she said again. Still blank stares. "I kill dragons and evils of every kind?", she said, hoping they would catch on. Xander made an Ooooooh! face, like he'd just got a joke, and quickly became more serious. "Yeah, see, that constitutes a problem, because there aren't any dragons here, nor have there ever been. Plenty evils, but no dragons.", he said as though he was talking to a child. "Right?", he said, checking back with Giles.

"Wrong.. But of course, they're all dead now.", he said, clearly lost in thought. "Erm... Where did you say you were from?", Giles asked Beskyddare. "I've not really settled in one place, though I do prefer my house in the Falkreath hold over the othees.", she complied. "Falkreath... Ah, where is that?", Giles asked, puzzled. Buffy had a sinking feeling in her stomach. If Giles didn't know where she was from, that meant that she was either really really exotic, or really really exotic of another dimension. A dimension where women dressed like Berserkers. And never bathed.

"In Skyrim. Which is in Tamriel, which is on Nirn. What are you, a child?", she said, frustrated. "Where ever that is, you're not there any more. You're in _this _dimension now. Giles, does this dimension have a name?", Xander asked. Giles shrugged. "I imagine it would simply be called our dimension.", he said. "You're in _that_.", Xander finished. "Are... Is this a Daedric realm?", Beskyddare said with a quiver. "What's a Daedric?", Xander asked. "Okay, so I'm not in a Daedric realm then. But, then if I'm here, that means...", she started and stopped.

The dragons were here as well. Beskyddare tried to jump up from the couch and grab for her swords. Buffy and Xander held her back. "No! You don't understand! I have to kill them! I have to find out what they're doing! I need to stop them from coming here! Let me GO!", she shouted, fighting against them to run away with her weapons and hunt the dragons once more. But they managed to keep her at bay, and forced her back on to the couch. "Let me go! I need to go!" She struggled once more, but finally gave in. "Not until you explain what and who 'they' are!", Xander said to her.

"The dragons... I was hunting one down, and they were all disappearing, and I came here with one and he can't be that far away, only a few miles! I need to find it and kill it! It's too late to try and find out why they're here, we have to kill them all! You people say that dragons have been extinct for hundreds of years, you and your people aren't ready for the burden of keeping the dragons at bay, and killing them! I can stop them, but I can't from in here!", Beskyddare yelled. "First of all, we are plenty ready for dragons! We've got better weapons than what you've got by large!"

"Second of all, you aren't going anywhere in that.", Giles retorted, pointing to her heavy steel armor. She looked down at her armor, and back up again at the people around her. They wore such strange clothing. It was soft and decorative, and their pants was made of a strange fabric and color. Would she have to dress like that, too? She would far prefer her dresses at home, rather than some rough and coarse woven pair of pants and a clingy shirt. "Maybe my things are too different from yours... Fine. If I make myself look like all of you, with you please let me go after him?", Beskyddare begged.

"I have to go with you, too.", Buffy said. "And me!", Xander added. "I'm coming too!", Dawn exclaimed. "Dawn, you are not coming. You are staying with Giles and looking for more information about all of this.", Buffy said, exhausted. "But-" "DAWN. End of discussion!", she growled. She turned back to Beskyddare. "Now,...", Buffy started, searching for her name. "Beskyddare.", Beskyddare said haughtily. "Okay, for all intensive purposes, you are gong to be called and introduced as Becky. Got it? Come with me, let's get you some new clothes. We're about the same size, though there are some minor... Differences."

"You mean like she's somewhere around a D38 and you're a C38.", Dawn said snidely. Buffy glared at her and ushered Becky to her room. She shared one with the women of the scoobies and the new slayers that weren't off being trained by numerous mystical sorcerers and such. Right now it was just herself, Willow, Dawn, and two of the newest slayers, sisters; Donna, an orphaned curly haired brunette, about ten years old, and her sister Sasha, who shared the same curls and colors, but was eighteen. They were on patrol at the moment, and willow was in the basement studying. It was amazing she hadn't come upstairs.

She'd meet Becky later. The bed room was pretty big, and was lined with beds and trunks and wardrobes, as well as two shared vanities. Buffy had often thought of convincing Giles to put in a locker room. She pulled a few items out of her dresser and lay them on her bed. "Okay, Becky, that's what I have to offer you for now. You can get a job to help pay for board, and get some of your own clothes. That bed by the window is yours, and that old armoire is yours, too. Put your... _Armor_ in it and get dressed.", Buffy said pointing to each thing as she said it.

There were a pair of jeans and a t shirt, a pair of shorts and a long sleeves cotton shirt with a little heart at the bottom, a short denim skirt and a cross back tank top, and finally an ankle length linen skirt and a blue camisole, the only shoes to select from were a pair of army surplus combat boots. She chose the long skirt, the camisole, and grabbed a denim belly jacket. She thought she looked ridiculous then, but then Buffy said she had to wash and do her hair and face. Her odd brown/blonde hair became a lot brighter, and now it smelled like lilacs.

Buffy braided her hair, which turned out to be a bit of a chore, because her hair was so long. Eventually, all outfitted and cleaned up, Becky looked exactly like Buffy. There was just one problem. Becky was very pointy, and none of Buffy's bra's fit her. Buffy dug through the extra clothes closet, where they kept lost and spare clothes for every girl of every size, and managed to find a D40 bra. She grouchily helped Becky put it on, and Becky found it fit perfectly. After a few embarrassing questions, Buffy explained the point of bras and bra sizes. "So, I am a D40?", Becky asked.

"Yes. Would you please stop rubbing it in?", Buffy groused. "Don't feel bad about it. I must have been the same size before I had my children.", Becky said as she pulled her shirt back down. Buffy looked up with interest. "How old are you?", Buffy asked a little worried. "Twenty-five. But I had my first child at nineteen.", she said. "You're the same age as me, but you've already had kids? How many?"

"I have three born children, two adopted. Sofia and Lucia are adopted, Audulfr is the oldest born and the oldest boy, then it's Hirvifrid, my sweet little daughter, and last it Beiti, my baby boy. He's three. "

"You have FIVE KIDS?! I haven't even been married yet!"

"I married at seventeen. We didn't think it was a good idea to have kids yet, due to my line of work, what with the imminent peril and all. So we just waited until the most of it was over, and finally got to go ahead and... Well, you know. Augh, that was the worst period of my life. It wasn't the world being threatened with destruction, or my homeland and my empire being torn apart; it was not being able to make love to my newly wed husband for two years. Too much of a risk of getting pregnant."

"Risk of getting... What, you guys don't have protection where you're from?"

"I don't think I get your meaning from that."

"You know, a contraceptive? A condom? The pill? Implants? Y'know, birth control."

Beskyddare stared at her blankly.

"Okay, evidently not."

"Well, there is an experimental potion, but so far it's only managed to make the women and men who use it barren."

"That's not good."

"Yeah. It's most definitely better to wait. I had to wait to do it before I was married, too. I'm a good girl. I didn't make love before I was married to anyone _with _anyone. Then, the first chance I get to go ahead and do that deed, I can't. I waited ninteen years to have a go and I just... Augh. Of course, you should know what I'm talking about, waiting to have sex and all."

"Yeah", Buffy said as she looked down and rubbed her arm. Se looked back up to see Beskyddare buckling her belt, and sliding her swords in to the sheaths. Buffy shook her head. "Oh, honey, we have to get you some new weapons.", Buffy said, looking Beskyddare up and down.


End file.
